Have you ever asked yourself why you’re afraid of falling in love? Maybe not.
You know those butterfly-in-the-tummy moments when you meet a new person and you’re head over heels for them. You get so attracted and have this crush thingy on them so bad you wish you could have a happy ever after chapter.
Then something comes into the picture, that thing holds you back that you bottle up all the feelings and throw it down to the depth of the sea so it never surfaces again. That something is ‘fear’.
You become so scared to fall in love so hard for a person only for them to leave you like you never meant a thing to them.
You become so afraid of the pain that comes with heart breaks, those nights of hot tears rolling down your cheeks and endless questions of what actually went wrong.
You become so afraid that after kissing you goodbye, they kiss another person hello.
In fact, the concept of love scares the shit out of you that you run away after a short while of romance.
These things happen, the bleeding heart doesn’t want to stop bleeding.
This is the fear of love. This is philophobia. It is fear of emotional attachment, the fear of being in love or fear of commitment in a relationship.
Philophobia can happen as a result of previous traumatic experience in relationships. It can also occur when a person witnesses a relative or friend go through heart breaks or divorce. Such person tends to shy away from falling in love so he or she would not feel what such relative had felt.
Philophobia affects one’s social life adversely and can make you shut out everyone especially the opposite sex.
According to some studies, they say philophobia is more common in women than in men.
You may need professional and medical help when philophobia becomes so chronic.
Sometimes when I see women or men of 30-45 years rocking single lives and not ready to be in a relationship, it could be philophobia. I feel that they are not afraid to love but scared of not being loved back and they are not afraid to try again but scared of getting hurt for the same reason.
Read more by clicking this ‘Is It Love or Emotional Dependency’
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This is great. I enjoy your article. You're making us proud.
Toke Suave says
Thank you dear.